YOU AREN’T IMPORTANT!
These are the words that entered my mind and cut deeply into the core of my soul in the middle of Starbucks at 6:00 a.m. on a chilly Fall morning in 2016. When this unwelcome statement penetrated my thoughts, I was reflecting on a question in a book that challenged me to think about what negative beliefs I have allowed to enter into my mind.
During this season, I was meeting with a group of high school girls that I mentor at Starbucks and arrived earlier than normal to prepare. Unfortunately, I was not ready for the chaos that was about to ensue in my mind and heart as I became aware of a lie I was internalizing as truth. I looked out into the dark parking lot and thought deeply as I felt the loneliness and silence of being the only customer in Starbucks. Like a deer in headlights, I became paralyzed in the moment, as those three repulsive words opened a wound deep within. I began crying uncontrollably as I realized the depths of my struggle as those precious high school girls began entering in for their lesson and discussion.
It’s funny how our agendas are sometimes sabotaged by something greater and more pressing. And at this moment, I knew I needed to heal from an unhealthy thought process. Let me explain...
I have the habit of allowing people’s actions and words to determine who I am.
I go through long spurts of only allowing my faith in God to determine who I am. Then suddenly, without warning, I have a day I find myself entangled in the actions and words of another human being. So, on that morning in Starbucks, I came to the realization that I allow myself to feel unimportant when I allow the words and actions of people to penetrate my heart.
When I place value in how important I am in the eyes of another person, I become ensnared in lies of who I am not, rather than in the truth of who I believe God created me to be.
The discussion with these girls on this particular Fall morning became about NOT believing in the lies we tend to tell ourselves, but rather believing in the significance of clinging to who God says we are.
No human being has the power to determine who I am!
Whose words and actions do you give authority to over your own life? Who do you allow to control the thoughts that enter into your mind?
Written By Holly Hall